Monday, February 22, 2010

Well hello Jayson, please introduce us to your new friend...

Pic via Todd Zolecki

I'm, I'm just speechless. It's beautiful. I just can't stop starrrring at it. It is none other then the wonder, the evolution, the testament of my dear adopted-but-he-doesn't-quite-know-it-brother, Jayson Werth's beard. Ya know, I've been looking for a good picture to really address the fact that Pitchers and Catchers have reported down in Clearwater, but THIS my dear reader friends gives me my reason to put on a Phillies cap everyday (as if I needed anymore reasons). I wonder if they will give the beard it's own number, or if it will become #28A. The philosophy of Jay Wert's facial conundrum could flow down many avenues, however, I think the most prominent and irrefutable is that it is common knowledge amongst those in civilized society that men are most prepared to handle any scenario, such as bears, when bearded in such a manner. Nothing says, "Jeter I am gonna eat your babies for breakfast covered in Cholula" quite like a beard like this. Or "I'm ready to hit a line drive to yo' face Chan Ho Park" (who just signed with those bastard Yankees) like this mug shot. And what I am most excited OF ALL for is the faceoff (ha) between Jay Wert's beard and Myers Chin-beard when they take on the Astros for a facial hair throwdown. Ahhh I can smell the dollar dogs right around the corner...


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